Archive for John McCain

Quick Shots

Posted in brilliance, economics, legal system, politics, randoma, reproductive health, the complete opposite of brilliance, war with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 22, 2009 by vagabondsaint

Some insight into my blog-writing process:  every day, I read the Huffington Post, New York Times, and various other internet news sources looking for interesting things to write about.  Once I find something, I bookmark it in a folder called “blog ideas,” to look into later or do more research about – or totally ignore.  Of the things that I find, maybe 20% of them actually do get written about here; for others, I lose interest, the moment’s urgency passes, I just don’t have enough to say on the topic to justify a full entry, or I just never get around to the actual writing part. (I do have a life, and it sometimes gets in the way.)  Sometimes I just don’t know what to say.

Now that my list has grown way too bloody long, I’ve decided to share some of the things I didn’t write about before.  However, since there are so many, I’ll have to limit my comments on each item to just one or two lines and let you read the links.

Basically, this is my bookmark clearing-house.  Ready, set. . .go!

1. Missouri coffee drinkers share the hot, steaming cup of love!

2. Smarter than the average bear?  Maybe.  Smarter than a top-of-the-line bear-proof canister? Definitely!

3. When this guy says he’s “gotta see a man about a horse,” call the police.

4. You know the real estate market is rough when people get violent over Monopoly properties. . .

5. It’s not just Alaska’s problem:  rape victims in many places often have to foot the bill for examinations and rape kits.

6. Something to keep in mind next time you call someone a slut. . .or are called one yourself.

7. When you’re tripping balls, every bush is on fire and can talk – so was Moses just high?

8. Conservative think-tank (they can think?) Heritage Foundation calls a bill pushing for harsher child-rape penalties “overcriminalization.” People, I beg you, do not trust Republicans around your children.

9.  Yes, Dear Canada, America is, in fact, on crack.

10. The Chinese have better political sensibilities than we do; they trust sex workers more than politicians.

11. Proof that God has a sense of humour: A British actor in a swine flu prevention commercial came down with – wait for it – swine flu.

12. What you’ve always suspected is true:  your brain really is working against you. As is the CIA.

13. If you only click one of these links, for the love of all that’s good and holy, make it this one about how and why conservative are always wrong. . .with historical evidence to back it up.  Brilliant!

14. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder – and the Photoshop of the photo editor.

15. I don’t know how to fix the obesity problem in this country, but I’m pretty sure that this is the wrong tactic.

16. Looks like freedom of speech only goes so far. . .

17. Why is John McCain the only Republican willing to stand up to conservative nutjobs? There’s gotta be more somewhere. . .

18. When a machete- and gun-wielding convicted killer gets better health care than his surviving victim, something is well and truly fucked up in this country.

19. Who’s really out to kill Grandma? It ain’t who you’d think.

20. “In recognition of your service to this country, we’re going to take away your child custody rights. Thank you!”

21. Welcome to Tennessee, where you can carry guns in bars, parks, and – wait a second, maybe not so much the parks.

22. “‘Round these here parts, you start wavin’ a picture of  Obama with a Hitler ‘stache, you can ‘spect a asswhuppin from an old Armenian man, and that’s how it should be.”

23. If you’re in a POW camp, Monopoly is a great, fun way to pass the time – or, you know, help you break out.

24. So, that high-tech phone you’ve got?  Chances are, if it gets stolen, its makers would rather force you to buy a new one than help you get it back.  The bastards.

25. Last but certainly not least, some sexual assault prevention tips that are guaranteed to work!


VS – 09.22.09

The End Of The Beginning

Posted in economics, politics, war with tags , , , , , , , , on November 9, 2008 by vagabondsaint

Over past few days, I have seen, both online and in my physical-world travels, various signs, buttons, images, and advertisements all proclaiming the same thing:  “YES WE DID!”

To the people who put those up, I want to say something:  don’t break your arm patting yourself on the back.  The real fight has only just started.

Barack Obama is our President-elect now.  This is beyond good; this is a change in America unlike anything ever seen before.  Don;t get me wrong; I’m over the moon about Obama’s victory.  I just don’t see it as the end of the many, many problems facing America today, and I’m not going to sit back and say “I voted for Obama, I did my part, it’s all up to him now.”  It, by which I mean making this country a better place, is and always has been up to us. . .or should I say “we,” as in, “We, the people.”

And, as always, there are people opposed to the changes that we, the people, spoke out and voted for, in record numbers, last Tuesday.

Let’s not forget that there is stll someone else in the White House, and he’s got two months to finish fucking up America and making it such a huge mess that it will be difficult for the next President to fix things, let alone to know where to start.

What’s Bush been up to while we were all busy watching the election and lost in celebrations afterwards?  Well, he’s reduced the number of outpatient services that will be covered under Medicare, meaning more poor people will be unable to get medical attention, plus hospitals that depend on Medicare will suffer budget shortfalls.  The Bureau of Land Management has announced that it will soon began selling leases to drill for oil. . .in Utah, where the expected amount of oil to be found is barely enough to justify the expense of drilling, but the damage to surrounding parks and natural wonders will be incalculable.  His office has spoken out against the European hope of creating a new international financial regulator, choosing instead to seek better enforcement of current regulations (how have those been working out so far, by the way?).  They’ve launced new attacks on wolves in Yellowstone National Park, according to the Defenders Of Wildlife.  All that, in addition to numerous other offense against civil liberties, the environment, and abortion rights.

So, while you’ve been celebrating, they’ve been quite busy, without having to worry about media scrutiny.

That’s enough to worry about, to me.  But there is, of course, more.

John McCain lost the election, decisively and with no way to claim he was cheated or that the election was stolen.  He’s not a threat anymore.  But his campaign. . .see, in the name of winning at any costs, the McCain campaign, in its final weeks, turned to three things that usually work for the GOP:  stirring up fear, anger, and prejudice against their opponents, promoting an “us against them” mentality and using the tactics of division to propel themselves to victory.

Obviously, that didn’t work this time.

But, once awakened, that three-headed beast of fear, anger, and prejudice doesn’t go back to sleep just because someone lost.  Already, a cross has been burned on the yard of an Obama supporter (in New Jersey, of all places).  The KKK’s national director, Thomas Robb, states that he sees Obama’s election as a great recruitment tool for the struggling Klan, as a reminder that whites “have lost power in this country.”  Given the negative emotions that Mr. McCain’s absolutely disgraceful campaign stirred up (if you watched his concession speech, look at the audience and at the anger they feel. . .that emotion has to go somewhere, after all, and the Thomas Robbs of the world will be waiting to turn that anger towards their own purposes), Mr. Robb may be correct in that his recruitment will increase, but I think it will be just as due to McCain’s negative campaigning as it will Obama’s actual victory.  (Interestingly enough, Robb points out in that interview that Obama is half-black, something that everyone else seems to forget.  Are Thomas Robb and I the only people that want to give credit and recognition to Obama’s entire heritage?  That’s scary.)

So, in addition to all the problems we had before, Bush is using this time to make new ones, and America may have new enemies inside its own borders now, thanks to strongly negative campaigning by the GOP.

YES WE DID get Barack Obama elected.  But NO WE DIDN’T instantly fix America.  That’s going to take a lot of time, thinking, sacrifice, and work on the part of all Americans, not just our new President-Elect and his cabinet.

I can not help but recall the words of Winston Churchill after the defeat of the Germans in North Africa in 1942, a major turning point of World War II:

Now, this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.

For all those that seek change, our war is just beginning, too.

VS – 11.9.08

The Ugly Genie Ain’t Goin’ Back In The Bottle

Posted in politics, racism with tags , , , , , , , , , , on October 17, 2008 by vagabondsaint

I’ll just say it:  the McCain Campaign is a f***ing disgrace.  (Bill Kristol agrees, though he put it in better terms.)  Losing on the issues, the campaign made a decision to put out negative attacks ads and have Palin and other supporters give speeches that are divisive when we need unity, and were obviously intended to direct anger at the state of America towards Obama, even though the Republicans are the ones that supported the deregulation and irresponsible tax programs that led to the current state of the economy.  While I must give McCain credit for repudiating the nastiness stirred up by his campaign, I have to subtract that credit from him because he let his campaign get this way in the first place.  (How nasty and divisive has this campaign been?  Check out this video from, of all sources, Middle Eastern network Al-Jazeera, doing what American media can’t or won’t do:  talking to people at rallies and exposing their ignorance and racism.)

So just how successful has McCain been in tamping down the nastiness that his own damn campaign has stirred up?  Well, let’s see. . .

This morning, a reporter was physically attacked at a Sarah Palin speech.  These people love America so much, you’d think they’d know to respect the rights of free speech, a free media, and the right to not get kicked for doing your bloody job, eh?

Speaking of free speech, it’s a given in election years that some political signage will be stolen or vandalized.  It’s reached epic proportions this year, though, and the (Democratic) victims of these crimes are fighting back. . .with YouTube!  All it takes is a surveillance camera and a computer, and any free-speech-hating, win-by-cheating, property-stealing McCainnonite can find themselves the latest YouTube star! (And a bizarre community has grown, with people worldwide watching surveillance cameras, trained on an Obama sign, to make sure that nothing happens to it.)

In California, the Sacramento County Republicans had material on their website that tried to link Obama to Osama and suggested that the Democratic presidential nominee should be waterboarded!  This is ridiculous!  What has Barack Obama done to deserve this sort of hate?  Nothing, other than be a black guy running for the Presidency.  Unfortunately, he’s running against a campaign willing to appeal to the lowest elements of American society in order to win, and that acts surprised and claims innocence when the hatred they stirred up starts boiling over and out of their control.

And. . .oh, I saved the best of the worst for last. . .

From the southern California newspaper The Press-Enterprise:

The October newsletter by the Chaffey Community Republican Women, Federated says if Obama is elected his image will appear on food stamps — instead of dollar bills like other presidents. The statement is followed by an illustration of “Obama Bucks” — a phony $10 bill featuring Obama’s face on a donkey’s body, labeled “United States Food Stamps.”

The GOP newsletter, which was sent to about 200 members and associates of the group by e-mail and regular mail last week, is drawing harsh criticism from members of the political group, elected leaders, party officials and others as racist.

I debated long and hard about putting the image in question in this blog, and have for now decided to do so. . .if only so that my reader(s) can be as sickened and angry as I am.

California GOP group offers this as eveidence that they can out-racist any Southern state.

California GOP group offers this as eveidence that they can out-racist any Southern state.

John McCain, listen up:  this is the result of your negative, divisive, insubstantive, ego-driven, issue-ignoring, win-by-any-means-necessary campaign tactics.  This is what you’ve done to America; you’ve provided a voice and a platform for the ugliest, most ignorant elements of America’s population.  Given your repudiation of these tactics, you show that you disagree and are even angered by such tactics, which speaks well of you.  However, that things even got to this point shows that you, if you are indeed as honourable as you purport, are not in control of your campaign or your party.  If you can’t control those two things, you sure as f*** can’t control the country, and you should not by any means become President.

VS – 10.17.08

The Final Debate: Bi-Racial Superman* vs. Blinkhelm von Angrypants

Posted in politics with tags , , , , on October 17, 2008 by vagabondsaint

I watched the Presidential debate, and didn’t really get much of anything new out of the words they said, aside from John “Cap’n Insane” McCain finally making some of his negative ad allegations to Barack “I’m So Cool, It’s Snowing INside My Thoracic Cavity” Obama’s face, and watching Obama knock them aside like the feeble jabs of a cancer-ridden septuagenarian.  While it definitely was not the “game-changer” that pundits (and even Obama spokesmen) said McCain needed, it didn’t hurt him much, either.  Rather, the words didn’t hurt him.

His actions, on the other hand. . .

Eye-rollingEyebrows raising in disbeliefFrowning.  Blinking 3000 times in 90 minutes. McCain’s face, whose elasticity surprised me, and his body combined to ruin his debate performance.  He oozed contempt, anger, disrespect, and frustration for the last hour of the debate, after he got off to what seemed a pretty good start.  (My best friend explained the blinking thusly:  “It’s past his bedtime.”)

So, who won the debate?  Pollsters everywhere agreed that Barack Obama won the debate pretty handily.  In, the face of McCain’s repeated and often untrue attacks, he remained calm, steadfast, and unruffled.  (To be fair, Obama engaged in a little truth-stretching himself, but not in his attacks.)  Obama might as well have come right out and said what I was thinking:  “I had to fight Hilary Clinton just to get to this point.  You ain’t s***, compared to that.”  McCain, on the other hand, became visibly angered and more flustered as the war of words went on.  It was like watching a fisherman throwing out bait and hooks willy-nilly, trying to land the big fish, but has forgotten the first rule of fishing: be smarter than the fish.

So, the third debate goes to Obama, making him 3-0 for the debate season.  With Biden’s victory in the VP debates, that brings the Obama/Biden ticket to a 4-0 win over McCain/Palin.  Go, Team Obama/Biden!

By the way, the whole “Joe the Plumber” thing is so ludicrous to me that I’m not going to mention him ever again, barring a major development.  That said, it seems he’s not all that McCain touted him to be. . .

VS – 10.17.08

* – I decided to stop calling Barack Obama “Black Superman” and go with the more ethnically-accurate “Bi-Racial Superman.”  The reasoning for this?  In the old days of the South, if you were so much as one-sixteenth black, you were black, no matter what other ethnicities composed your background.  I’m not going to keep that system of dismissive, derogatorily-intended labelling alive.  From here on out, I’ll be referring to Barack Obama as being bi-racial.  If and when my daughter should ever ask me what she is, I’ll tell her the exact same thing. . .and that she needs to be aware and proud of all of her heritage.

Sympathy For The Soulless

Posted in politics, ramble with tags , , , , , on October 9, 2008 by vagabondsaint

You know,  I feel a little bit sorry for John McCain.

He just wants to be President.  He’s wanted it for at least 8 years, since he threw his porkpie hat into the ring in 2000’s Republican primaries.  In that campaign, America and McCain were given their first national taste of the nastiness that is Karl Rove politics:  McCain’s honorable adoption of a Bangladeshi child was twisted, through push polls and fliers handed out by Bush supporters, into rumours that the child was actually fathered by McCain, out of wedlock, with a black prostitute.  (It was actually loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooongtime Republican Senator Strom Thurmond who had fathered a black child out of wedlock, but that wouldn’t come out for a few years yet.)

That horrible smear campaign in South Carolina and other places killed McCain’s hope for the Presidency in 2000, when he was still a relatively-youthful 64 years old.  And it was tanked by an upstart whippersnapper who came out of nowhere (Texas, which is close enough) to have the election handed to him on a silver platter by his dad’s Supreme Court cronies and his brother’s corrupt state government officials in Florida win the election, without putting in nearly as much time in the military or in Washington as John McCain had.  And this upstart has the support of people that McCain has worked with in the Senate for years?  He had to come out of that feeling a little betrayed by his own party.

That’s frustrating enough right there, right?

Then comes 2004, and he doesn’t run.  After all, things are good under Bush. The country seems pretty happy, though there are some rumblings in the leftist media about the war in Iraq.  McCain has used the intervening years to support Bush more, curbing his previous “maverick” tendencies in a bid to gain some ground with the conservative base, which he now knows he needs to win anything ever again, and which he has pissed off in previous years.

Interestingly, McCain’s name was floated as a potential VP not for Bush, who would not need a new VP thanks to innovations in cybernetic technology that allowed Dick Cheney to retain a small semblance of life and humanity, but for John Kerry, who McCain defended against the “swiftboating” tactics employed by Rove to discredit Kerry’s war record.

Now it’s 2008.

After years of pandering to the conservative base, McCain is ready to run again.  Bush can’t run again, Rove is ostensibly retired, no one but the undead would actually vote for Dick Cheney (they have to support their own, you know), and the way is clear, right?

Ummm. . .not so much.

In the years between 2004 and 2008, a lot has happened.  Bush, who McCain threw support behind once he lost in 2000’s primaries, is the most unpopular President in American history.  The war in Iraq has dragged on too long with no end in sight.  The economy is beginning a long slide down to hell.  Bush and his cabinet have been caught in lie after lie after falsehood after misleading statement, and many have been forced to resign.  Some have actually been convicted of crimes (we didn’t forget you, Scooter Libby).  The Republican Party has lost its majority in the Senate and the House, due to Americans just plain being tired of their crap.  And Dick Cheney shot a guy in the face.

That conservative base that McCain has spent 8 years trying to earn some love from is a shadow of its former self.  The Republican Party itself is splintered and fractious.  Still, McCain runs, trying to unify the GOP under his umbrella and get some of the people he pissed off earlier in history back onto his side.

And, surprise of surprises. . .he does it.  After short-but-nasty battle with Rudy “9/11” Giuliani, “Massachusetts Mormon” Mitt Romney, and Mike “Hey, That Last Arkansas Governor Did Good As President; Wanna Try It Again?” Huckabee, John McCain wins the Republican nomination for President!  Now the path is clear!

Wait. . .what’s that coming down the Democrat Hill? Why, it’s freshman senator Barack Obama and former-First-Lady-turned-New-York-Senator Hilary Clinton, guns at their belts, beating each other with sticks so they can save the bullets for John McCain!  And no matter which one wins, the Democrats will have a history-making, headline-grabbing, attention-demanding candidate, with an assumed built-in fan base among either women or racial minorities!

Look at it, if you can, from McCain’s prespective.  He knows, and has known for a long time, that he would do a good job as President.  He knows he’d be the best President ever, that he could fix the economy, catch Bin Laden, save health care, fix global warming, and end poverty in America within the first week that he’s in office.  It’s written on his face, in Morse code in the wrinkles:  he knows he should be President.  He knows he deserves to be President.  He’s worked a long time trying to prove it to other people, to earn their support by voting for things he doesn’t like or support, and getting well-accustomed to the taste of special-interest d*** along the way.  Now he’s done it, he’s reached his moment in the sun. . .

And a freshman senator from Illinois is threatening to ruin it all.

McCain, if I haven’t spelled it out well enough yet, is hopelessly narcisstic.  It’s obvious.  He doesn’t understand when people disagree with him. He doesn’t understand why he’s trailing in the polls.  He didn’t understand why his first choice for VP was nixed by Karl “I Have More Influence Than You’d Think” Rove (who threatened to turn the conservative base against McCain if he went with Joe Lieberman, who would have attracted moderates and some Democrats to the ticket) or what was wrong with choosing the base-appeasing, easy-on-the-eyes, moderate-scaring, womens’-vote-swaying (in theory)  Sarah Palin for VP.  He doesn’t understand why his running mate, a pretty woman working an ugly campaign, is actually costing him support now.  And he doesn’t understand how he’s losing to Barack Obama.

His narcissism shows when he isn’t shown outright love by the media.  It shows in the debates, where his disdain for Obama is readily apparent, though I think it’s a disdain born more of his own narcissism than it is any actual animosity towards Obama.  That might actually make it more dangerous, though; dislike can be reasoned away.

That’s what I saw on that stage Tuesday night:  I saw someone that honestly doesn’t understand why they have to be there, why they have to answer questions and clarify themselves.  I saw someone who doesn’t understand why it isn’t obvious to everyone else that John McCain should be the next President of this country.  I saw someone that thinks that he should be President, that he deserves to be President, and that sold his soul to his party and to Rove disciples who are running a campaign even worse than the one run against him in 2000, and doesn’t understand why he’s still losing in the polls.  He was frustrated, flustered, disorganized, angry, and confused. . .and you can’t put that down to just old age.  I’ve known people older than McCain that were far sharper than any six people half their age put together and multiplied by three, so no, I’m not taking shots at McCain’s age here.

The John McCain of 2000, whom I liked, and who called out Sarah Palin by name as an example of pork-barrel-spending gone out-of-control in 2001, is not the man running for President this year.  The man running for President for the Republican Party is someone that sold his soul and sacrificed his principles, his honour, his integrity, and his beliefs in a desperate final bid to become President of the United States.

And that’s exactly why he shouldn’t be President.

VS – 10.09.08

P.S.  Oh, I just couldn’t resist this:

Your lifeforce will sustain me for at least two weeks

McCain to small child: "Your lifeforce will sustain me for at least two weeks" (Photo courtesy AP)

Campbell’s Soup And Meltdown Stew

Posted in economics, media failure, politics, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , on September 25, 2008 by vagabondsaint

If, like me, you’re a bit worried about the impending meltdown of the American financial system, worry no more:  someone has a solution!

Unfortunately, it’s Sweden.

The Swedish faced a similar economic crisis in 1992, and dealt with it in a way that returned the grand majority of cash to the taxpayers and tightened up their banking industry.  By draining funds from shareholders first, forcing banks to write down losses, taking ownership of banks, returning the profits of distressed asset sales to the taxpayers, and eventually selling their shares in the banks, the Swedish government turned their economy around at very little cost to the taxpayer.

I say it’s unfortunate that Sweden has that solution in its history not because I have anything against the Swedish.  How could I have anything against the homeland of the Swedish Bikini Team?  It’s unfortunate because we in this country (America) have an administration in office that lacks the smarts to learn from its own mistakes, let alone the wisdom to learn from those of others.

Please, Sweden, send your ambassadors into the White House.  Let them explain to George Dubya and Barack “BS – for Black Superman” Obama and John “BS – for exactly what you think it stands for” McCain how your country saved itself from a financial meltdown.  Maybe they’ll listen, and whichever one shows the wisdom to learn from your mistakes (hint: it won’t be the white guys) is the one that needs to lead this country.

In other news. . .

I am gaining more and more respect for CNN’s Campbell Brown as this campaign goes on.  She’s been ranting like, well, any sane person would in this election season, and I gotta admit, I like it.  Let’s talk a walk through her best recent rants:

Here’s Campbell Brown railing against the GOP campaign’s effort to keep Sarah Palin away from the media:

And here she goes after Bush and Paulson:

And let’s not forget how she made McCain spokesperson Tucker Bounds look even more ridiculous than his name does:

Ah, Campbell Brown.  The hearty soup of your rants is a welcome break from the watery gruel of other cable news correspondents.  Keep speaking out and speaking up; you speak for and to a segment of the population that desperately needs to be heard in the media.

VS – 09.25.08

Tears From Gas, Balls Of Brass, Hypocrisy: It’s The RNC! (While I Was Sleeping, Part Three)

Posted in brilliance, economics, politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 15, 2008 by vagabondsaint

I had actually planned to cover the RNC night-by-night in several separate posts, because there was just so much inherent wrongness in the proceedings that it would have taken several blog posts to cover it all.

However, due to time constraints and my own impatience to cover more current events, I’m just going to sum it up day-by-day and move on to all the stuff that’s happened since I started playing catch-up.

Suspension of disbelief is required. . .you won’t believe the things they said and somehow got away with.

Ready, Republicans?  On your mark. . .get set. . .go viciously and hypocritically attack your opponents without proposing solutions to or even discussing the major issues affecting Americans today!

Monday, September First

Monday was a bit of a slow day for the RNC, since Republican leaders were busy either being in Louisiana for Hurrican Gustav or busy talking about Hurricane Gustav on TV.  The poor delegates were left at the XCel Center, clueless and leaderless, because, as one delegate put it, “some people are getting rained on.”  Believe it or not, that was one of the most compassionate statements heard all week from the Convention.

Adding to the distractions from the Convention: Sarah Palin’s possible ethics violation in trying to get her ex-brother-in-law fired and the revelation that her 17-year-old daughter is pregnant.  Does it strike anyone else as slightly hypocritical that the party that brought us abstinence-only education, whether we wanted it or not, is rallying behind someone for whom it failed miserably?

(By the way, in that Troopergate article, mention is made that Palin has “has a proven record championing transparency in government”.  What bullshit.  Even as mayor of Wasilla, she ordered city employees not to talk to the press, our best apparatus for ensuring a transparent government.  As governor of Alaska, she used, and encouraged her cohorts to use, private email accounts for state business, in an attempt to prevent those communications from being subpoenaed.  Think I’m making that up?  Click here.)

The best action was the protests around the convention, where, due the lack of major activity at the convention, police were forced to make their own fun by tear-gassing and pepper-spraying protesters, including Brendan Kiley, a reporter for Seattle weekly news magazine The Stranger.  I’m sure that both his pepper-spray shower and the $1.9 million that St. Paul police spent on tear gas and pepper spray for the RNC were well-deserved.

So, as I said, a quiet first night for the convention. . .well, except for the lobbyist parties.  I’m glad that the lobbyists and delegates listened to McCain’s request and kept things toned down.  Jerks.

And if you’re like me, and wondered why the GOP picked St. Paul for the convention, well, wonder no more:  The Daily Show knows why.

Tuesday, September Second

RNC Theme For The Night:  John McCain, The Complete Sellout He Is and The S.O.B. That Barack Obama Is

The night began with a speech by current president and nominal leader of the Republican Party, George W. Bush (in case you’ve forgotten who he is, as the RNC seems to be trying to do).  I am a bit, um, befuddled by Bush’s speaking at the convention.  After all, isn’t all he what the McCain campaign is rallying about changing from?  When they talk about the bad governing of the past eight years, isn’t he the person who was in charge of it?  So they’re having him speak in favor of McCain?  The only way that this could make sense is if someone came up with a way to blame someone other than Bush and his Republican-controlled Congress (until 2006) for the problems of this country.  But you’d have to be a complete bullshit artist to do that.

Of great interest is this part of Bush’s speech: “When he takes office next January, John will have an outstanding leader at his side. America will have a strong and principled vice president in the Governor of the great state of Alaska, Sarah Palin.”  Ummm, what?  McCain’s going for President here; isn’t he supposed to be the “outstanding leader” of the two?  And I believe Bush when he says that Sarah Palin is an outstanding leader as much a I believed him when he said there were WMDs in Iraq.

We (as in me and the people who read this blog regularly) all know that I love The Daily Show. But they really, really outdid themselves with the comparison of Tuesday’s RNC speakers, Fred “If I’d Won, Sam Waterston Would Have Run Against Me” Thompson and and Joe “Backstabbing Without Even So Much As A Reacharound” Lieberman to cartoon characters Foghorn Leghorn and Droopy Dog, respectfully.  It’s a Moment of Satirical Brilliance, truly.

So what did Senator Leghorn actually say, I said, say?  Well, I just linked you to the speech right there, so you can read it in its entirety, if you want.  As for me, I’m just going to briefly touch on its most prominent lie, with some help from

Thompson repeated misleading claims about Obama’s tax program, saying it would bring “one of the largest tax increases in American history.” But as increases go, Obama’s package is hardly a history-maker. It would raise taxes for families with incomes above $250,000. Most people would see a cut.

That Obama is certainly out to fool us!  How dare he propose the majority of Americans take a tax cut while slightly increasing capital gains and dividend taxes and closing the loopholes that allow corporations to get away with paying barely any taxes at all!  He must think we’re stupid, if he thinks we’re just going to let him waltz into the White House and leave us with more money in our pocket!

And Senator Droopy?  Surely, as  former Democrat, he wouldn’t have taken part in the partisan lying and mudslinging, right?

WRONG! Oh, so, so wrong!

Droopy Lieberman (which sounds like something that a man should see a urologist about) took his brush, dipped it in GOP-approved slime, and happily slathered Barack Obama with a healthy coating of crap.

Lieberman said Obama hadn’t “reached across party lines” to accomplish “anything significant,” though Obama has teamed with GOP Sens. Tom Coburn and Richard Lugar to pass laws enhancing government transparency and curtailing the proliferation of nuclear and conventional weapons.

Hey, I thought government transparency was Palin’s department. . .

Lieberman also accused Obama of “voting to cut off funding for our American troops on the battlefield.” But Obama’s only vote against a war-funding bill came after Bush vetoed a version of the bill Obama had supported – and McCain urged the veto.

Sigh.  Oh, Droopy, when you get back into the Senate, the Democrats are gonna treat you like shit, and your own legislative director will quit, and you’ll deserve it. . .but will you even hear it over the jingling pieces of silver in your pocket?

One more thing I want to share:  Karl Rove, Bill O’Reilly, pundit Dick “My First Name Says It All” Morris, McCain’s senior policy adviser Nancy Pfotenhauer, and Sarah Palin herself starring in a gender-card hypocrisy parade, courtesy of The Daily Show.  Seriously, can someone please, for the love of God, tell me why the “real” news sources don’t use clips like these when they actually talk to these people?  Why don’t they make them confront their own hypocrisy? Why?

And where is Dick Cheney?

Wednesday, September Third

RNC Theme For The Night:  Save Us, Sarah Palin, Save Us!

Well, several people spoke that night; all but one were losers in this year’s Republican primaries (or, as Jon Stewart called them, “ghosts of candidates past“).  You’d think that would have made for a much more interesting night than actually happened, wouldn’t you?  You would. . and you’d be wrong!

Former Arkansas governor Mike Huckabee, who is, in my eyes, the most personally likeable of the Republican candidates (and yes, I’ve met him personally), delivered a. . .well, a pretty blah speech, really.  It was almost like he didn’t want to give the speech, somehow.  In addition to his speaking woes, he’s also bad at math:

Huckabee told conventioneers and TV viewers that Palin got more votes when she ran for mayor of Wasilla than Biden did running for president. Not even close. The tally: Biden, 79,754, despite withdrawing from the race after the Iowa caucuses. Palin, 909 in her 1999 race, 651 in 1996.

Then there’s Mitt Romney, who I am convinced is actually a robot.  His hair absolutely never moves, his teeth are entirely too perfect, and his voice never changes.  I fully expected him to step outside of the XCel Center, start mowing down protesters with his laser eye-beams, and eventually have to be stopped by Superman.  He scares me.  Moving on.

Next up, former NYC mayor and Republican presidential hopeful “9/11” Rudy “9/11” Giuliani “9/11” gave his “9/11” speech.  If you’ve “911” made it this far “9/11” into this paragraph, then “9/11” you know what a typical “9/11” Giuliani speech is “9/11” like.  However, he managed to restrain “9/11” himself that night, holding out for an entire 13 minutes and 57 seconds into his speech before mentioning 9/11.  (However, I firmly believe his legs, hidden by the podium, were trembling from 9/11 withdrawal.)  He didn’t screw up too badly, though; he did call John McCain a fighter pilot when he, in fact, flew bombers, and distorted Obama’s reaction to the events in Georgia to make them seem different from McCain, when in fact both of them called for the UN Security Council to step in, as did the White House.  As far as speeches for that convention went, it was one of the more honest ones.

And then it was time for Sarah Palin to speak.

She was late for her speech; she’d been busy outside shooting protestors from a helicopter and then dragging their bodies inside to field-dress them, but once she got cleaned up, she came in and gave a speech that would be inspiring, encouraging, heartwarming, and persuasive to anyone with less than three functional brain cells.  To the rest of us, it sounded like this: niceties, joke, joke, lie, lie, joke, lie, joke, family, lie, blatant hypocrisy, partisan attack, lie, denigration of community organizers, lie, partisan attack, attack, lie, praise McCain, joke, lie, lie. had a field day with her speech; I’m just going to hit the low notes:

  1. Lied about her flip-flop on the Bridge to Nowhere (again)
  2. Lied about Barack Obama’s record on ethics reform; she dismissed legislation he cosponsored as not being “major law or even reform” though it led to major changes in how lobbyists can legally operate in Washington
  3. Misrepresented Obama’s tax plans as increasing income taxes for everyone when they would actually cut taxes for 81.3% of Americans (but she didn’t misrepresent as badly as McCain, who outright lied)
  4. Lied in saying Obama is against producing more energy; he isn’t and isn’t even against increased drilling, within limits
  5. Mocked Obama for being willing to meet with the heads of “terrorist nations” without preconditions, something that even the Bush Administration is now embracing (presumably they’ve learned that aggressive saber-rattling and pre-emptive invasions only get you hated more)
  6. Lied in saying that Barack Obama is worried that suspected terrorists won’t be read their rights; in fact, he hasn’t said anything to that effect but has supported the rights of detainees to challenge their incarceration in federal court, a decision that the Supreme Court made earlier this year.
  7. Lied about building a gas pipeline in Alaska, which the oil companies opposed due to its prohibitive expense, and used that difference to back her claim of “opposing Big Oil.”  The pipeline she wants built isn’t past even the planning stages yet, and it’s not a certain deal yet.  Meanwhile, the oil companies actually do want a pipeline, and Conoco and BP have started work on plans to compete with hers, but she wanted one big enough for the oil companies that are already there plus room for new companies to come in.  Not so much a matter of disagreement as it is the oil companies wanting to keep their monopoly and Sarah Palin wanting to bring in more companies for more revenue.
  8. Lied about standing up to oil companies.  Other than the disagreement over the pipeline, they’ve been in alignment on every other issue, including offshore drilling and opening up the Arctic National Widlife Reserve for drilling.
  9. Mocked Obama’s experience as a community organizer. . .which, aside from being ignorant as to what community organizers do (they have responsibilities, you know), is also hypocritical, given that one of the themes of the Convention itself was Service, and that is what Obama did as an organizer:  he served his community.

My bullshit meter just exploded.  And now I have outrage fatigue.

Sarah Palin’s speech was of course met with many cheers and howls of applause from the moronic idiotic conservative crowd in attendance, as if they were either too stupid to know that she’d just lied her ass off or so desperate to stay in power that they’d follow her off a cliff.  (Hint:  it’s desperation.)

Which finally, finally, brings us to. . .

Thursday, September Fourth

Theme For The Night:  If You Missed Last Night, You Missed All The Good Stuff

Look, Cindy McCain spoke, then John McCain spoke.  If you want to know what he said, click here.  If you want to know what lies he told, click here.  I can sum it up like this:

  • All the same lies he’s told before.
  • None of the excitement of Sarah Palin’s speech.
  • Some idiot made the mistake of scheduling McCain’s speech on same night as the opening night of the regular football season. . .it’s like they wanted nobody to watch this speech.
  • Reminded us that “POW” is to “McCain” as “9/11” is to “Giuliani.”
  • Railed against “constant partisan rancor.”  Hey, John, did you actually watch the preceding three days of your own convention?  It was full of the partisan rancor and mudslinging you’re talking about in your speech!  If I may make a suggestion:  start getting rid of partisan rancor by taping Palin’s mouth shut.
  • Ended his speech by urging all Americans to “stand up to defend our countries from its enemies.”  Well, Mr. McCain, I’ll be doing exactly that when I vote for Barack Obama, instead of the party that’s ruined America over the past 8 years.

Man, I’m just tired now. . .but that’s the RNC, covered, over, and, thank God, done.

Next time. . .oh, who knows.  I’m like two weeks behind on news right now.  I’ll think of something.

VS – 09.15.08